The Off Season Solo Traveler

How I Overcame Trepidation and Found Calm as a Solo Traveler in Paradise

Many snowbirds love traveling in the off season. My snowbird friends include solo widows and widowers. Although married, I found myself in a situation to travel solo. As stated in my "How to Pack for a Weeklong Getaway in a Beach Bag post, this is how it came about:

"When the opportunity arose to stay at the beach for a week, I didn't hesitate to go for it. It would be just me, solo, for a Saturday to Saturday week in paradise. My husband and dog would stay behind largely due to my dog's physical restrictions from a recent knee surgery and also because of the remaining portion of our kitchen reno. The reno was already scheduled with our vendor and contractor and the dog was absolutely not able to travel. My husband could not leave, but he was very supportive of my decision to get away. For me, this would be a workcation combining deep cleaning our vacation rental in the middle of peak season with leisure time enjoying the beach service reading a book under an umbrella."

"There are a few adjustments I would make, but overall it was a success and I could and would do it again."

To be perfectly honest, I didn't go on the trip without trepidation or concerns. There were times I questioned my decision, especially within the first few days upon arrival. I secretly wondered if I should reschedule my flight and depart on Wednesday instead of the planned date of Saturday. Quickly recognizing I would have wished I was still at the beach if departing early, I decided it would not only cause regret, it would be a huge mistake. "Be in the moment, adjust and enjoy" is what I told myself.

I've flown solo and traveled solo for a few days, but never for a full week. Being homesick is a concern that many, including me, wonder if it will happen when away as a snowbird as well as this summer getaway. For my solo work-cation, I felt a very real possibility of becoming homesick and/or physically ill -- perhaps feverish, bedridden and who knows what could happen. "No one will be there to take care of me." Don't borrow trouble is the best answer I came up with. I brought a digital thermometer to take the guesswork out of the "Am I or aren't I feverish?" and it provided just the right amount of sanity and comfort that it was there if needed.  

As a married woman at the beach during peak summer vacation season, I was surrounded by a sea of families. Grandparents, parents, couples, teens, kiddos and babies. All of them in groups and very much enjoying themselves. "I don't fit in. I'm solo, married and not looking to mingle." That's OK. I decided it's fine to do my own thing, be friendly, polite and low key, but enjoy the other guests from an arm's length. Summer travel is completely different than snowbird season. Snowbirds are outgoing on purpose because we all know we will run into the same people for weeks or months at a time, hopefully in the present and for years to come.

My sister reassured me that I would adapt and start to develop a new normal. She should know, she bravely relocated to Oahu, Hawaii almost a decade ago without knowing anyone and quickly integrated into the Hawaiian culture and her new island life. For years my twin walked everywhere because she did not have a vehicle. For my weeklong work-cation, I purposefully chose to walk everywhere. I don't need a car or the trappings of my suburban life in Indiana. I can walk everywhere too. I don't need a delivery driver to drop stuff off. I can get it myself by walking to the store or skip it for a week. Embrace the pedestrian lifestyle and that is exactly what I did. 

I also thought about the strong solo snowbird men and women who spend the entire winter in their warm weather communities and successfully make it work. I have female school classmates and friends who travel solo and seem to be just fine if not even stronger based on their experiences I've witnessed on social media. I can do it too!

After I got past my self-doubts, I began to embrace my time alone and find my own new normal. I changed pace into a different routine and realized change is not that bad. Early in the morning starting around 6 am, I completed the "work" part of the work-cation. I missed my husband and beloved Golden Retriever, but I didn't have to deal with their daily care. Nor did I need to be particularly quiet or especially tidy like at home, where I have to keep socks, towels and food out of reach of the dog. After a light breakfast of restaurant leftovers, I headed to the beach for time to enjoy the waves and beach lounge chairs. Some days I frequented the community pools AND the beach.

Mid-day was the hottest, so back to the condo for a late lunch and a nap in the air conditioning. One day it was so hot and I was craving something sweet I managed to chase down the ice cream truck. A $5 ice cream sandwich never tasted so good. Although there was a heat index over 104 degrees most of the week, I cleaned up for dinner and took an afternoon walk in the very hot heat to the restaurant of the day. I enjoyed local authentic New Orleans Cajun meals, fresh seafood, gourmet pizza and on the last day, a special treat of key lime pie. Although daylight is longer in the summer, I didn't want to be out past dark.

Highlights of my walks included exploring the upscale historical Frangista Beach neighborhood and visiting The Emerald Coast Winery, a charming wine tasting room featuring wines made of local round-shaped Muscadine grapes that are native to the Southern United States. 

I spent evenings on the balcony and very little time watching tv. Instead I read a book that had been on my to do list and worked in between the leisure time. The purpose of being at the beach was both work and a vacation and not working is not a good idea. So I made sure not to lose focus.

To be perfectly candid, my husband also grew in the week I was away. He stepped up with the work that I usually do when home and went above and beyond with managing the kitchen renovation project, the care of our convalescing dog as well as running our core business. 

The ever present sights and sounds of the Gulf of Mexico were just the thing to provide a zen kind of calm. Waves crashing onto the shore. Sugary white sand. Chilly wine spritzers at sunset. In one week I changed, grew and created my own time away that was perfect for me. The new memories I made for my very special time at the beach was just the thing I needed. Yes, I will absolutely do it again!